It was on November 29, 2017 that my life changed entirely. And this is part of my story…Three days before (nov 27) I went to the Optometrist because I was having a blurry vision on the left eye. I was seeing everything with a grey cloud on the nasal area, it was like being half blind or something which by the way I didn’t know what happened or what caused it. I thought I was the result of a Very strong migraine or a headache but it Wasn’t it was more than that.
My optometrist found out that I was having a Optic Nerve Inflammation (Optic Neuritis) was the diagnosis. I didn’t know what to do or who to call or if I should googled it but I thank god that I just went straight to home and called my mom and my boyfriend to let them know what was really happening. This inflammation made the Dr. sending me to the Hospital on which I spent 6 days hospitalized. All this happened because the Optic Neuritis is one of the first symptom that a patient with a high risk of having MS commonly presents.
This was a HUGE dare for me and it wasn’t easy. My aunt took me to the hospital, and I was very positive that nothing bad would’ve happened (even though I know that I vae MS I’m still very positive) I didn’t know anything about the implications of the diagnosis until the neurologists at the hospital ordered me to do an MRI and a bunch of other analysis. They made me do three of MRI’s one of the brain, the eyes and a cervical one which btw made me feel really nervous and uncomfortable because it was on a closed machine and sometimes I’m afraid of small and closed spaces. At that moment I couldn’t stop thinking, because it was my first time and I had to be strong if I want to know the truth.
When it came to reading the results two of them came clear, but on the brain one they found out about ten small lesions. Which made everything worse that it was already (but I kept really positive all the time). I’m not going to lie, I was so damn scared and I saw my future in pixels black and white not on 4K technicolor.
(This is not my brain but it’s an actual representation of how a brain lesion looks like)
Not all of the MS patients are the same. My lesions are much smaller than this ones and they didn’t have the lights (those lights are on because the Immune system made them appear when is fighting it).
So yeah, three neurologist came to tell me the news, that I was a patient with a High Risk of having Multiple Sclerosis (an autoimmune sickness). My world stopped and tears didn’t stopped running through my face, I just saw my entire life changing in so many ways. It was a really hard moment for me and all that I could think of was What will I do now?
The Doctors at the hospital order me a bunch of analysis and a lumbar puncture (which was a really funny one though) I was sooooo dammn nervous that I couldn’t stop talking and laughing. This lumbar Puncture will determine part of my diagnosis, but The science has improved soo much that with the Optic Neuritis and the Lesions on my brain my doctor used both of them to determine my panel as an MS patient. She put me on a Preventive treatment (I’m using Copaxone 3xweek) as long as we wait for the next appointment and the results so that my diagnose can have a more clear path. But i’m still on shocked.
And now all that I have to do is wait, have faith and be POSITIVE because I’m stronger than MY DISEASE. So, If you are reading this and you are having MS symptoms go to your doctor or just discovered that you have MS seek for professional help. I just want you to know that we’re not all the same, and you can’t compare yourself with any other MS patient. You’re unique and special in every single way and we’ll get through this, at every cost. Will keep on moving forward and we will not let MS control us or depression inside our lives.
And honestly I still don’t know what I will do now, but as long as I have faith, confidence in ME, the support of my family, my boyfriend and my friends and My doctor I will move mountains. But now, all that I want is to find accept this, and have a good humor. (mostly on shot days)
Just keep FIGHTING! Don’t give up, life just started for us.